Yan Fei is 28, a computer programmer in the Zhongguancun Area in Beijing, and has a master's degree from Peking University. He is one of the "IT elite". And, with his good looks, you can bet he's a hit with the girls. The truth is, however, he's still single.
But, that is not necessarily as strange as one might think. The media have reported that there are hundreds of men like Yan in Zhongguancun, waiting for the right girl to find them. Meanwhile, according to another report, female white collar employees are in an even deeper trap. It said that these "elite" people have no chance to meet each other.
One telecommunications company in the Zhongguancun Area has about 200 employees and about 40 per cent of them are single and above the age of 28, according to Beijing Youth Daily.
Companies have tried to organize parties and clubs for these singles in hopes that they could find their Ms and Mr Right.
But it seems that the results have not been all that great. "It's almost impossible to get to know someone well in two or three hours at a party and falling in love at first sight seems too old-fashioned for our age," Yan said.
These young and wealthy people should be the ideal husband or wife material. With their perfect educations, high salaries, and good jobs, they seem to be full of glamour.
Yan spends his days sitting in front of a computer. The heavy workload has somehow become a part of his life. He can hardly find the time to start a relationship with a woman.
According to Wang Zhenyu, who studies marriage and family issues at the China Academy of Social Sciences, there is an irony in the modern high-tech communications: while it helps keep people constantly in touch, it has also stopped them from interacting face-to-face. "People call others on the mobile phone instead of asking them out to meet. Chatting on the Internet and exchanging short messages makes the voice obsolete in communications," Wang explained.
The Internet has had such a profound influence on young people that 65 people out of 147 recently surveyed by Xici.net (almost 45 per cent) said they have been using the Internet as the major means to make new friends. Sina.com, which did its own survey on "cyberlove" (falling in love with someone on the Internet), found some quite surprising results: 63 per cent of the nearly 10,000 people questioned said they had experienced cyberlove and 53 per cent said they believed in these cyber-relationships.
Dong Weiwei, 28, who works in an office in Nanjing, told China Daily about her experience. She said she fell in love with the poetic words she saw on the screen and the attractive voice that spoke to her over the phone. Unfortunately, she found that prince charming had been married for seven years. "I stopped it because I hate a man who has no sense of responsibility for his family," said Dong.
But, that was only one obstacle in the path of true love for single white-collar workers.
This month, a survey by the Datasea Marketing Research Company found that good morals, good education, a promising career, and good physical appearance were the four golden qualities for a partnership.
When Ms Dong in Nanjing was asked to comment on this, she said she thought they were essential in choosing a husband. However, "Up to now, I haven't found anyone who meets these requirements who is also available and in love with me."
"Things could have gone better for them," was how Zhang Liping put it when asked about the problems these people face. She is a 25-year-old editor for a Beijing newspaper, and she and her future husband met in university and married two years after graduation.
Romance is generally not encouraged at most Chinese universities. And, in any case, there is a saying that, "university couples seldom stay together after graduation." But, there are the lucky ones like Zhang who says she is enjoying her life.
"I was so fortunate to have found my Mr Right on campus, allowing me to start planning for the future early," Zhang says with a smile. "But some of my classmates are still struggling to find Romeo or Juliet." Zhang thinks they just missed the best time to find a spouse - on campus.
But that sentiment is not shared by everyone. Yan Fei, for one, does not think that he missed out: "If I had been in a very serious relationship on campus, I might not be as successful as I am now. Love always takes so much time and energy away from study."
(China Daily December 30, 2002)
